What are we doing wrong?

Let's see some pics. That will help you get some solid answers around here. People here are cool and want to help. No need to feel basfull. Good peeps here.

 

They had said a couple of purple long lights (actinic) and a couple of small bright ones probably Metal Halide Wattage ???

Can we assume you added the clam and the anemone when you added the lights?

Getting control of your water quality is important before you add anything else. Where do you get your water for your changes? Do you use your faucet or do you have RO/Di or buy it premixed form your LFS?

 

Thank you everyone!!! I'm sorry, I haven't told you what kind of lights I have yet because I don't know. Boy, I hate sounding stupid! But as long as everyone has already figured me out, please tell me what is a protein skimmer. I do have a canister filter and cleaned it less than 3 weeks ago. They've told me cleaning it more than once a month wastes product, but under the circumstances that would probably be best, right?

 

I use R/O water that I get from an R/O store in town.

You described the lights perfectly. I did add the clam and the anemone when we got the lights.

 

Trust me, you don't sound stupid at all. There is not one person on this whole site that would even consider calling you stupid.
You are doing the smart thing, and more so the right thing, by asking for help. We are here to do just that.
We were all newbies at one point, and many of us still are. Heck, most of the people who have been doing it for forever will admit that they still don't know it all and they still make mistakes.

 

Thank you all for your kindness to me!!!

Since my water change yesterday my 3 fish seem more active and everything just looks better! How have those poor guys survived these horrible conditions? I think we're on the right track now. Should I do another water change tonight or wait until tomorrow? suggestions, please.

 

I would personally wait until tomorrow to do another water change, just to bring everything down little by little.

 

Ok cool so you are getting your water as R/O can you check with them and see if it is also Di? It is just one more filtering step that makes the water pure.

Since you are buying filtered water that means you are mixing your own saltwater, How do you measure how much salt is in the water? It will be a test "tool" some you add water and see how far an arm moves and others you add a drop to a telescope looking thing.

I know things are coming at you very fast, but relax and take a breath you deserve it. I am not familiar with your filter, but it sounds like it has some kind of a filter inside. It should be cleaned weekly this does not mean replacing it, it means rinsing all the poop out of it. When you get a skimmer you will probably remove the filter material and just use it for water movement.

Keep up the good work and never be afraid to ask a question !!

 

Have you also learned that a "water change" means draining some water and replacing it with saltwater.
But you also have water that evaporates and you replace that water with just plain R/O water NOT saltwater. (Evaporation leaves all the minerals and salt in the water and just pure water goes away)

 

I had been told that when I add water because of evaporation to add the ph booster at that time. But, of course, I was also told that you only need to change water when a catastrophe happens, otherwise you NEVER do! I'm learning that is very wrong!!! Of course, I'd say I've had a catastrophe anyway!
My salt says to add 1/2 cup salt to every gallon of water. Today I ordered a refractometer online.

Dang! I wish I was a chemistry mind instead of an English mind!