I Like Puns :)

Evidence has been found that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers.
However, all the Swiss league records were unfortunately destroyed in a
fire, and we'll never know for whom the Tells bowled.


A man rushed into a busy doctor's office and shouted "Doctor! I think I'm
shrinking!!". The doctor calmly responded, "Now, settle down. You'll just
have to be a little patient."


A marine biologist developed a race of genetically engineered dolphins that
could live forever if they were fed a steady diet of seagulls. One day, his
supply of the birds ran out so he had to go out and trap some more. On the
way back, he spied two lions asleep on the road. Afraid to wake them, he
gingerly stepped over them. Immediately, he was arrested and charged with
transporting gulls across sedate lions for immortal porpoises


A thief broke into the local police station and stole all the toilets and
urinals, leaving no clues A spokesperson was quoted as saying, "We have
absolutely nothing to go on."


There were three Indian squaws. One slept on a deer skin, one slept on an
elk skin, and the third slept on a hippopotamus skin. All three became
pregnant, and the first two each had a baby boy. The one who slept on the
hippopotamus skin had twin boys. This goes to prove that the squaw of the
hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides.


A skeptical anthropologist was cataloging South American folk remedies with
the assistance of a tribal brujo who indicated that the leaves of a
particular fern were a sure cure for any case of constipation. When the
anthropologist expressed his doubts, the brujo looked him in the eye and
said, "Let me tell you, with fronds like these, who needs enemas?"

 

Groan!!!