banned from wal mart

Discussion in 'The Bucket' started by footballdude2k3, Apr 18, 2008.

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  1. footballdude2k3

    footballdude2k3 Bristle Worm

    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2007
    Messages:
    134
    BANNED FROM WALMART...........

    This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.

    DON'T TAKE ME IF I DON'T WANT TO GO...........

    After Mr. And Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her
    husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.

    Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men--he found shopping
    boring and preferred to get in and get out.

    Equally unfortunately, Mrs. Fenton was like most women--she
    loved to browse. One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from
    her local Wal-Mart.

    Dear Mrs. Fenton,

    over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
    commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be
    forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr.
    Fenton are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance
    cameras.

    1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in
    people's carts when they weren't looking.

    2... July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at
    5-minute intervals.

    3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to
    the women's restroom.

    4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
    voice, "Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away."

    5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of
    M&M's on layaway.

    6. September 14: Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a
    carpeted area.

    7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and
    told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and
    blankets from the bedding department.

    8. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he
    began crying and screamed, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

    9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

    10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department,
    he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

    11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while
    loudly humming the “Mission Impossible" theme.

    12. December 6: In the auto department, he practiced his
    "Madonna look" by using different sizes of funnels.

    13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
    through, yelled "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

    14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud
    speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed "OH NO! IT'S THOSE
    VOICES AGAIN!"

    And last, but not least

    15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
    awhile, and then yelled very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!"

    Regards,
    Wal-Mart
     
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  3. hugoman900

    hugoman900 Astrea Snail

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2008
    Messages:
    36
    Location:
    Miami Beach, Florida
  4. nemo1991

    nemo1991 Millepora

    Joined:
    Mar 13, 2008
    Messages:
    907
    Location:
    rocklin
    thats really funny!
     
  5. plastrman

    plastrman Plankton

    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2008
    Messages:
    9
    Location:
    janesville, wi
    oh yes that was funny, laughed, good stuff but really think about it, that spinoff on our culture and future really kinda sucks. we need to keep funneling our future in to export. hate to ***** but that one struck a nerve
     
  6. jas3600

    jas3600 Spanish Shawl Nudibranch

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2008
    Messages:
    76
    Location:
    Ohio
    Thats great! No Toilet Paper!!!

    Haha....