Love Came Cautiously

Love Came Cautiously

like, at first, I tried not to notice her
she was lovely, lovable, loved
everybody loved her
I didn't want to notice her
she was too lovely for me
so I ordered vodka...in a long glass
with ice.

love came cautiously,
like, sometimes when she looked at me
her eye would linger,
like sometimes her hand would
when we touched, by chance,
near the bar
and I'd go all stiff
and mumble something stupid
like
"I really love...Bourbon"
and I'd order triples...
to show her my love.

but love came at a price,
like, now I sit with my guilt
at any empty midnight table
with another herbal tea
and another alka-seltzer
And Mr.Guilt,
dressed in the tatters of my life
runs his burning finger across my chest
naming my sins.

You see, we spent the night!
spent it like a dollar
and bought tequila and gin
and a carton of coopers...(red label)
yeah, spent it like a dollar
and bought a rain-cocooned night
where Guilt had to wait,
wet and snuffling,
outside Reverend Spooners Motel.

while inside the room,
our universe shrank to an ashtray,
car keys, an empty condom
and ten empty bottles
flaked out on the table...
My cigarette slipped into my drambuie
and in the blinding flash that followed
I saw her glorious face
and listered my blips.
The room spun
as I reached for the chardonnay '96
Her body, hot and naked,
straddled my retina.
A champagne cork blackened my eye
and the bubbles nickled my toes

I wanted her
I wanted to tell her of my love...
I wanted to call her name...
But my come wouldn't words out right-
You see, I was so tissed I could hardly pork
and all my dopes were hashed.