Discussion in 'The Bucket' started by JohnO, Jan 24, 2008.

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  1. JohnO

    JohnO Moderator

    Mar 7, 2003
    Melbourne, VIC,Victoria
    1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk
    ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just
    pretty much leave me the hell alone.

    2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan
    belt and leaky tire.

    3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to
    steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

    4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you
    can't be promoted.

    5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

    6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

    7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a
    couple of car payments.

    8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in
    their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and
    you have their shoes.

    9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

    10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to
    fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

    11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it
    was probably worth it.

    12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

    13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.

    14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

    15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half
    and put it back in your pocket.

    16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

    17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark
    side, and it holds the universe together.

    18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

    19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips
    are moving.

    20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you
    need it.

    21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

    22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a
    laxative on the same night.