I GIVE UP. So frustrated. Im forced out.

Just a note to keep this civil. This thread started out with some good heart-felt posts from all parties and appears to have derailed a bit. If you have a problem with someone's posts - report them with this button or ignore them. Please do not take snarky shots or air dirty laundry. Bickering degrades the tone of the site - which we try hard to keep welcoming for all.
THanks,

matt

 

Thank You Matt and apoligizes for the derailz.

 

Sorry to hear you having such trouble. I'm new into this hobby and it has been an eye-opener. Some of the same issues that you have faced regarding fish going MIA mostly.

I've taken many deep breaths and each time, refined, re-tooled, re-thought and re-read.

Perhaps just slowing a bit and keeping it simple, don't let the tank beat you. Just keep what you have and hang in there.

Four days after setting up my 150 in my living room my wife woke me up at 4:00am. She told me there were air bubbles in the returns! By that time I must have lost 20 gallons on the new carpeting in the living room! I felt like an idiot! I cried, she stood by me and rubbed my back, I started over from scratch.

You are not alone in your frustration. I respect what you are going through. One foot forward and on and on.

 

I, too, can relate to your frustration. I started my first 75 gallon salt tank about 4 years ago. Added the damsels and waited. No one died and the tank looked great so I started adding fish and coral. The tank inhabitants had been in there for months and I decided to move the inhabitants of the 75 into a 95 gallon tank that was drilled for salt. Everything died and continued to die for about 6 months. I had no idea what was going on and was getting so frustrated.
The people at the LFS were very nice and would ask questions, perimeters, lighting, ect. but to no avail. Everything I took home continued to die. At this time I had a few thousand dollars in the tank and only had a dog faced puffer and a few snails and crabs to show for my efforts. I was determined that I would overcome this and would have a reef tank to be proud of.
One day out of the blue it dawned on me, the 95 gallon had previously had breeding ciclids in it. To my horror, I checked the reading on the heater and knew 85 degrees was just too hot for coral and fish. I told my boyfriend and he told his family...then the joke got around that, all this time, we had been having a fish fry at my house. I had literally been cooking my critters.
Oh no...once I got the temperatures back where they should have been, i slowly started adding fish and coral frags, and to my delight, nothing was dying. This time around, my tank has been doing well for 2 years and I very seldom have to do anything to it. Top offs and water changes are all that are needed right now to keep it going. I have a home made lighting system that will be replaced next month but the coral looks good even with the home made lights.
Please don't think for a minute that you are the only one that has been frustrated with the reef tanks....we all learn from our mistakes. Good luck with what you decide.

 

And there in lies the key codeee111,

As I always say, nothing is set in stone...nothing. We have to realize that every persons tank is different- for those that have successful tanks- I can promise you, these tanks are very close to the same when it comes to water quality and lighting requirements as per their tanks/critters requirements.

Sometimes we forget that any water born critter- ANY, is directly subject to it's water quality- first and foremost, and hence, we as aquarist, we must try to match the water quality these critters require. It really is that simple. The tough part is matching and maintaining this water quality, which in turn creates stability- it is this stability that allows us long term success- it is super important.

Every time I top off water my critters react instantly to this sudden instability, then in a short time the system stabilizes and viola- stability once again, and this can be seen by the way your critters react.

This is why I always say, know your critters, in knowing this you can spot trouble, sometimes before it becomes a disaster.

The key to all of this, first- good clean/balanced water, patience, knowledge, more patience, and, then correct lighting.

Follow this, and you cant fail- nature created all of this to work this way.

 

You are so right... patience is very important... I'm still learning to deal with it.:

 

While I fully agree with 99% of what you are saying (well worded I must say), not all water born critters are subject to water quality issues or are dependent on water quality. There are numerous genus/species that can handle extremely poor water conditions (or a broad range of conditions), even some critters in our tanks (example: some harpac copepods can live in gnarly conditions). Not to mention not all water born critters spend their life in water.. mosquitos and dragon flies pop to mind.

 

yup your not the only one, if you guys saw my recent post, im in the same boat where everything got nuked.
My first nuke was last year at thanksgiving when i went to vegas, and came home after 4 days later, and my tanks heater failed and was at 52 degree, so had to start over, now my nephew nuked my tank with fish food, and ammonia is off the chart, all my coral except zoa frags died, and 1 fish died

 

I agree with everyone who has made comments to your post, please... please don't give up. The regret will be more painful for you than what you are feeling at this time. Take a deep breath and just go back to the basics and go slow..and know you are not alone in this... you have a lot of people here rooting for you to keep moving forward with you tank...

 

Great advise.