 More puns
Evidence has emerged that William Tell's family were avid bowlers. However, since a fire destroyed all the old Swiss league records, so we'll never know for whom the Tells bowled.
A man rushed into a doctor's clinic, shouting, "Help me! I think I'm shrinking!!" The receptionist calmly replied: "The doctor's busy. Please be a little patient!"
An Indian chief was feeling very sick, so he summoned the medicine man. After a brief examination, the medicine man took out a long, thin strip of elk rawhide and gave it to the chief, telling him to bite off, chew, and swallow one inch of the leather every day. After a month, he returned to check the chief's progress. The chief shrugged and said: "The thong is ended, but the malady lingers on."
An Apache chief had three wives. One slept on a deer skin, one slept on an elk skin, and the third slept on a hippopotamus skin. All three became pregnant, and the first two each had a baby boy. The one who slept on the hippopotamus skin had twin boys, which proves that the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws on the other two hides.
A skeptical anthropologist was cataloging South American folk remedies, assisted by a tribal medicine man who indicated that the leaves of a particular fern were a sure cure for any case of constipation. When the anthropologist expressed his doubts, the bruja reassured him: "With fronds like these, who needs enemas?"
You have tomorrow to recover
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Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so...Love the people who treat you right. Pray for the ones who don't. Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it! | 
