 HOW TO SPEAK AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
HOW TO SPEAK AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
She is not a BABE or a CHICK - she is a BREASTED AMERICAN.
She is not DUMB - she is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
She has not BEEN AROUND - she is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
She is not an AIRHEAD - she is REALITY IMPAIRED.
She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - she gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - she is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.
She does not NAG YOU - she becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.
He does not have a BEER GUT - he has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY
He is not a BAD DANCER - he is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - he INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.
He is not BALDING - he is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - he prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS
He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - he becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.
He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - he develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.
He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - he has SWINE EMPATHY.
He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - he is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED
He is not HORNY - he is SEXUALLY FOCUSED
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Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so...Love the people who treat you right. Pray for the ones who don't. Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it! | 
